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Parenting   
Parenting with Love
by Atasi Sen

A child is a divine gift. Adore him and take pleasure in bringing him up. The objective of parenting is to develop self- sufficient adults who can venture into the world with self belief.

The preliminary years are the most precious time when the pre-schooler is influenced most by his parents. There is an evolution in the child- parent, relationship, which demands parents to be more of friends, rather than being just parents. This involves a lot of love, understanding and dedication.

A friendly relationship can be accomplished through the usage of proper communicating techniques. In today’s fast-paced way of life, time management seems to be the most vital aspect. In spite of shortage of time, make sure you take out time for the young member of the house too. In the daily hassles of life, the needs of the little ones usually goes unnoticed. But it is the natural instinct of the kids to involve adults in what they are doing, thereby seeking their attention. Adults are often annoyed at being bothered this way. But children who do not get enough positive attention may irritate parents by throwing temper tantrums, for example.

The job of raising kids below five years is a remarkable task, exciting as well as challenging. By two or so, these children start going to school. So the role of the teacher too plays an important part in influencing the kids. At this stage, the teachers’ ability to persuade these young kids is very important. Bringing up these kids and dealing with these kids is not an easy task. One has to remember that the natural personality traits vary from child to child. The way the kids learn, how they interact socially, their inner drive, behavior pattern, etc. are all distinct, and these dissimilarities make each one of them unique. Each child has his own personality, which when trine to be enhanced rather spoils the natural beauty of this being.

A major challenge for early childhood grooming is to encourage children to acknowledge the feeling of anger, which is actually a natural outburst. Anger needs to find a vent but should be taught to express it in a less aggressive way. Parenting, based on punishment may result in the instant conduct alteration, but is more likely to tear down their self –esteem and leave them with a feeling of insecurity and thereby creating a rebellious aspect in them. A calm, soothing voice will go far to help the child feel supported and controlled. Merely touching the child to restrain his angry impulse is the best way. Be ready to show affection in such moments by suddenly hugging the child or so. That doesn’t mean there should be no discipline. In fact, the child at this age have a very limited ability to regulate their own emotions, which should be taught by the parents and teachers. Let the children bloom, but within a restriction. Limits should be clearly defined and restriction enforced. Yet children should be free to function within those limits.
In spite of being occupied with something else, when the parent puts aside every other task and devote oneself completely to the child, the reflection of gratefulness becomes evident on his face. This way the parents start to feel the emotional bondage bridging between them.

Shower love and care upon the child. Children love to be reminded often that people around him love and value him. The parents should learn to convey the love in the way that the child will understand. Receiving warmth and affection is very important for the child’s mental, physical as well as social development. Physical touch of affection and verbal confirmation of the fact that he is loved, is very essential, to cultivate a strong bond of friendship with the kid. Moreover when we converse with the child, it is very important to look at him, in his eyes. Praise him for little things too. Words of encouragement go a long way. Children are at a very creative stage specially when they are young. Children have an exclusive method of forgetfulness of the past where they are discriminative, because they tend to almost forget events in their past, yet never forget about those instance when they have been hurt. So do not hurt their minds.

Lend him your ears whenever your child so demands. When you start listening to your child, he too will learn to receive the indications of your wants. This is when you will be able to put across your expectations. It is not just words that convey love, but conversing with your child in a way which expresses your concern and your intention to be present in their lives, is what really matters. Apart from all these, make sure you have plenty of time to cuddle and hug your child for no reason at all. Kiss them at bed time.

Don’t make parenting too critical. After all it is a life long bond with the children. Parents and teachers should work united to create an environment in which the child can thrive to his full potential. At times we do become discouraged, but in such moments, we need to remember that God loves our children even more than we do. It is only that parenting finds a healthy and positive way to motivate our kids. Our children are tender buds full of promises to bloom into beautiful flowers. The kids actually deserve to feel good about themselves, not because they are pretty or intelligent, but simply because they are God’s best gift to us and they exist just for us.         

October 29, 2006

Image by RK

Top | Parenting   

The Week of October 29, 2006            
Will the PM Abet Corruption? by Rajinder Puri
US Elections and the Hell Shaped Curve by Gaurang Bhatt, MD  
United States Neurotic Obsessions
       with Pakistan's General Musharraf by Dr. Subhash Kapila
India's New Defence Minister:
      The Dilemma of Honesty or Efficiency
by Col. Rahul K. Bhonsle
Criminal Freedom versus Civil Thralldom by V. Sundaram 
Is England Becoming 'Little England'? by V. Sundaram 
Do They Speak ... These Statues? by Pradip Bhattacharya 
Death – An amazing phenomenon! by Pradeep Joshi
Beware! The Land Slides by VK Joshi
Home, Home On the (Nuclear) Range by Stephanie Hiller 
James Rennell: The Father of Indian Geography by Kumud Biswas
Michael Schumacher – the man and the champion by Yamini Ayyagari
Parenting with Love by Atasi Sen 
Love: A Pleasurable Pain by Julia Dutta
The Best of Both Worlds by Vikram Karve 
Chega Tchega Sega! by Naiya Sivaraj
The Witty Side by Melvin Durai 
America's Weakness by William R. Stimson 
The Global Village Is Tilted in America’s Favor by Glory Sasikala Franklin
I Want to be a Drop-out by Prakash Pathre
For the Sake of Laws by Aruni Mukherjee
Would Gandhi Win Today? by Rita Manchanda 
The State of Saffron by Elsa Sherin Mathews
Don't Stop the Flow by Gagandeep Kaur  
Bringing Health to their Doorstep by Sushmita Malaviya 
'I had an Abortion at Home' by Michelle R Bayaua
Mother's Recipe for Quality Schools by Malvika Kaul
 

 

 
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