Confusion by Bijal Dwivedi

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Confusion

In The quiet of the night,
I sit all alone,
A thousand questions thrown at me,
by someone unknown.

Questions about me,
questions about life,
Questions to answer,
for so long I strive.

Of all the years I've lived, I sit down and think,
My past, present, future, all I try to link.

What did I, What do I and what will I get?
Just this very thought, makes my eyes wet.
I try not to think, of what can't be,
But it seems from past, I just can't flee.

I get up and put on my favorite song,
A melody not heard, in so long.
Surprisingly it's not so special anymore,
As though a fish has come to the shore.

I feel so taken, with all I feel inside,
It's too much for tonight, "leave it," I decide.
I close my eyes and I'm off to sleep,
Lost very soon, in my dreams so deep.

Same old questions even haunt me there,
"Run away," I say, but to where?
Expectations to fulfill, Promises to keep,
"Will I be able to?" I think with grief.

"Yes you can" Angel voices say,
"You'll get through, just work hard and pray"
May be it won't be that bad after all,
Isn't Confusion a mountain that rises and falls?

– Bijal Dwivedi
Bangkok, Thailand
October 2, 2000



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