Romance is something we all desire. It is like a fire ... feed the flames or it will die. But what is it really? I have asked and been asked this question many times. Are you romantic? What do you consider romantic? Each of us has our own opinion on romance and how to express it.

A few definitions from the dictionary:

• marked by the imaginative or emotional appeal of what is heroic, adventurous, remote, mysterious, or idealized

• having an inclination for romance : responsive to the appeal of what is idealized,
  heroic, or adventurous

• marked by expressions of love or affection 

• conducive to or suitable for lovemaking.

I like "marked by expressions of love or affection" the best. Although ... "adventurous, remote, mysterious ... " sounds pretty good too.

After being married for 11 years it takes work to keep the "romance" alive. You both have to work at it. Its not just the little things you do for each other, it is also putting yourself into the things you do that makes a difference. There is nothing more "unromantic" then doing something for personal gain or doing it falsely. Be true or don't do it. 

How creative can we get?

1. You can leave his/her favorite candy/chocolate in their underwear drawer ... it will be the first thing they see when they open it. 

2. Write love notes ... leave them in places such as the sock drawer, the bathroom mirror, their lunch bag or briefcase, board game boxes, between the dinner napkin, remove the book mark from the book they are currently reading and replace it with your love lines, you can even EMAIL them a love note!

3. Put a mint on their pillow just before bed ... turn down the sheets.

4. Light a candle that smells of apples and cinnamon ... read him/her the lyrics to your favorite love song.

5. Let them be queen/king for a day ... serve them as they please ... remember, it is only for one day and they would LOVE it!!!

6. Say, "May I please kiss you?" and when they close their eyes.....plop a Hershey's Kiss into their mouth ... you can have one too.

7. Plan a special night out....go to dinner, go to the park, go window shopping downtown, hold hands.

8. Call your house and sing a love song to him/her into the answering machine. Be sure you let THEM hear the messages first! 

9. Fix him/her a bath. Light a candle/incense and let them enjoy some time alone ... in peace and quiet.

10. Show up at his/her office with lunch, flowers, candy and a big kiss. 

Ladies, it is ok to give your husband flowers ... trust me, they will love it!

There are many more ideas to keep your relationship fresh, healthy, alive and adventurous. Use your imagination and live a little! Keep in mind that nothing is too outrageous when you are doing it for your spouse. The key thing is: You are doing these things to show your spouse you love them, desire them, need them, want them and care for them. It is about the other person, not about yourself. If we both consider what makes the other happy, guess what? We will both be fulfilled. When you "romance" the soul of your spouse, you will keep them close to you and your heart forever. Keep it real, keep it fresh and keep it alive ... in doing so, you will always bring a smile to someone's heart.....be it his, be it hers or be it both.