Close your eyes and imagine Salman Khan gyrating to this superhit item number from his latest blockbuster 'No Entry'. Except there is no Bipasha Basu to match his steps this time. The extras are all dressed up in khaki police uniform and for a change it is not rented from Mangatraam & Sons Dresswala. The police is real and so is the court scene. Bollywood star Salman Khan spent Monday night behind the bars in Jodhpur after he was sentenced to a five-year prison term for shooting an endangered species of deer in Mathania, Rajasthan in 1998. However I am sure there are plenty of his fans who could give teach him a few moves if Salman wants to break into a jig in jail.

Salman's past is catching up with him and fast. He currently has more cases against him in court, than films on the floor. He faces another charge of killing two black bucks. Other film stars also facing this charge are Saif Ali Khan, Sonali Bendre and Neelam. He was given a one-year prison term in this case, which is under appeal and he is presently out on bail. In another case, Salman faces a charge of possessing an unlicensed weapon. He is also facing charges of killing a person sleeping on the street in a state of drunk driving.

While Salman has spent time in jail before, in his movies, this was probably his first experience behind the bars in real life. Salman has always attracted controversy. From being a violent lover to threatening his ex-girlfriends' boy friends he sure has come a long way from his first hit film Maine Pyaar Kiya where he played the good boy to the hilt. His life has all the ingredients of a Bollywood masala film - beautiful women, passion, violence, love, envy and tragedy. Alas it is not a fictional judge who is the one saying "cut" and "pack up" this time round.

The betting market has warmed up and bookies are taking bets on how much time Sallu Bhai will actually spend in jail. His producers have started doing the round of their favorite temples - they collectively lose Rs. 150 crores if Salman goes to jail.

His fans can only hope that Salman's real life would sort itself out like Papa Salim's scripts. Fast forward to circa 2011. Salman emerges from the familiar Central Jail, and asks the havaldaar at the gate for a smoke. The guard willingly obliges and retrieves a single Marlboro lights from behind his left ear (I have always wondered if all havaldaars at jail gates keep a mysterious never-ending stock of bidis and cigarettes but that is for some other day...). Salman looks tired and he is beginning to grey at the sides but his muscles are bulging from underneath his open shirt. The fire in his eyes is still alive and he is ready to take on the unfair system that sent him to jail. Slowly he takes his first puff of freedom and surveys the terrain for familiar sights. The camera pans to reveal a hot dusty day. There is not even a cow in sight, let alone signs of public transport to reach the nearest human settlement. Suddenly a phoren made expensive car screeches to a grinding halt next to him. Salman's face betrays no signs of surprise. The dust settles down, a door opens and it's his producers. As he bends to step in, the motley bunch of producers breaks into a song...

Main maal se gaya,
Main taal se gaya,
Main jaan se gaya,
Main jahaan se gaya,
Lut gayi lut gayi sari film industry...
Salman di galli vich no entry!!!