And then a really advanced AFD would come and say, " hey do you know that THAT GAL who bought THAT GUY and unka official ho gaya . and THAT GAL-2 and THAT GUY-2 ,they are also almost official ho gaya. So why aren't you guys going out again ? "

I'm still in my senses and I repeat what has become my mantra - "was no Big deal"

And I think if the three quarters of your brain, which is empty, is filled with gibberish, the gibberish goes and affects the one sane quarter as well. 

I thought about it and realized 5 % of college students in their four years here end up going around with somebody. The other 95 % (AFD's) have their share of fun trying get those 5% together. Or better still what is better stuff for an late night discussion than a guy (AFC) being LJBF 'ed or bluntly turned down! 

So I think its not that suddenly the entire world has turned its sinister eyes on me and relax and feel its just a part of a well planned community enjoyment drive. 

Then at the breakfast table, somebody I've never ever talked to, would come up and start speaking as if he was I tied-your-langoti-when-we-were-young .

" Can I ask you a question?" 

Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?

"How's your love life? " 

"well excuse me !" ,I say

Him : "oh, I was just wondering if you are the guy she's crazy about."

Me : "what are you talking about ?"

Him : "Now don't act like u don't know anything."

Me : "I actually don't know anything."

Him : "actually a guy proposed to her and she told him 'Lets Just Be Friends'"

So she had LJBF'ed a guy ;) I felt bad for whoever the guy.

I contemplate ... " Lets Just Be Friends": When a gal says that she means - I don't just want you to mourn the loss; I want to remind you of it every day. I want you to suffer. I want you to envy the guy I go out with sometimes. I want you to die slowly, a bit at a time. And I want you to smile and thank me for it !!

He continues, "She says there's another guy she's crazy about. So are you the guy ?"

Me : "oh that's not me. maybe I know who it is but definitely not me."

Him : "who do you think it could be then ?" 

Me : "I cant tell you. I've been sworn" 

I swell with pride as I think, 'hey she confided in me ,you now guys go and gossip. I've finally separated myself from the class of AFD's. yeah, ha-ha !' 

Him : "if you r thinking its Mr. XYZ (name changed!). That's not him. That was her old crush." 

Now its just like I've been hit by a scud missile at my very foundation. How did he know about the guy? These AFD's are GOOD at their job. or she's probably told somebody else before. 

Visibly the interrogator sees he's caught me off guard so he fires another quick,

"So is it you ?" 

Me : "Its not me . She told me that. And I'm not telling u any further" and I suddenly realize my citizen rights "I want my lawyer before I make any more statements!"

I always thought I'd very easily fit into the ranks of a pro - AFD. But now they've got me - to start thinking about her. 'So does she actually like me ;) she did buy me after all. One wouldn't buy somebody just like that. Maybe I've got something going here. Have I been blind after all?'

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. In the depth of dry-old-nerd-life, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible wish-to-follow-my-heart.

And then another pro AFD comes up and says - "I saw THAT GAL who bought THAT GUY going around with that guy. And you know some gals says you are the only fool, had you tried you too would be a happy pair by now." 

'oh shit' I think. 'me jackass. all this while. I gotta do something quick. after all she's not gonna stay there for me forever. I did really love her smile (She can kill with a smile). and those eyes (She can wound with her eyes), oh when I had looked into her eyes -The sky's was a different blue. She's good some grey cells as well - what more could any guy ask from a gal. I've gotta do something.'

Stupidity is a personal achievement which transcends national boundaries. 

{[now if you r into the whole thing now and really excited about what happened . let me tell you something. I was wrong when I said 95% have their share of fun trying to see a jackass get LJBF'd from a gal. its all 100% ! ]}

Of course before I am going to do anything dramatically stupid I always pause for some time. 

And according to the highly secretive "male code of ethics" there are sometimes when you are allowed to talk to another guy about a gal.

So I go up to the quietest guy I know, who wouldn't whisper a tone, my friend who doubles up as my shrink. and pour out my misery. 

Me : "so what do you think?" 

Him : "hmmm"

Me : "what shud I do ?"

Him : "hmmm"

Me : "say something u bugger !"

Him : "So do you think this gal has got something going for you"

Me : "How would I know?"

Him : "While talking to you, does she blink more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes. "

Me : "I don't think so !"

Him : "While talking to you, does she rests an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up."

ME : "Ahhhnn ?? Nope. "

Pause. Silence. The Shrink is visibly upset. He's got the -- " God must love stupid people, He made so many of them" -- expression on his face. Still he's a friend after all. So he continues.

Him : "do you think u got something going for this gal ?"

Me : "how would I know?"

Him : "okay every time she walks by...."

Me : "yes....?"

Him : "First, your heart falls into your stomach and splashes your innards. All the moisture makes you sweat profusely. This condensation shorts the circuits to your brain and you get all woozy. When your brain burns out altogether, your mouth disengages and you babble like a cretin until she leaves."

Me : "na that doesn't happen !"

So once again shrink so easily settles all the mental turbulences. and I go off to sleep. peacefully. 

Until the next person of the creed of demons would come and tell me, " Did you see her today?...."