The Doctor's Diagnosis

The Doctor diagnosed the patient's illness as hydropsy.

The patient asked the Doctor, "What does that mean?".

The Doctor replied,"It means too much water in the body". 

The whisky-drinking patient was indignant and replied that I have never drunk a drop of water in my life.

The Doctor paused, and sadly concluded, "Then it must have been the Ice".  

Repartee by Sir Winston Churchill

Once in a gathering where Winston Churchill was also present a lady remarked , "Sir Churchill I do not like two things about you, One your Moustache, and the other your Politics'".

Sir Winston Churchill promptly replied,"Lady don't worry, you will come in contact with neither.

Ref: A jotting from my 1960 Diary,

The British Parliament.

In the British Parliament a member inadvertently sat on his hat after concluding his speech.

His Irish colleague rose to say ,"Permit me Mr Speaker to congratulate the honourable member who, while sitting on his hat did not have his head in it".

Ref: From my diary, 1944. 

Viva Voce Examination

As MBBS students we were having our Viva Voce examination in Medicine. One of my classmates was unable to answer any of the questions asked by the Examiner.

At last the Examiner said, "Alright I will ask you a simple question".  

Suppose you are working in a Class One Hospital. What complications of Lobar Pneumonia do you expect to confront?

My classmate confidently replied, "None" as I am working in a Class One Hospital.  

The Examiner called for the next candidate in line.

Ten Commandments

A woman was mailing the family Bible to her brother in a distant city.

The postal clerk examined the heavy package carefully and inquired if it contained anything breakable. 

The quick reply was, "Nothing but the Ten Commandments".

Ref: Karl B. Rollins.

Don't Cry Over Spilt Soup

A Chinese farmer was walking along the road with a stick across his shoulder.

Hanging from the stick was a pot filled with soybean soup. He stumbled and the jar fell off and broke into pieces. The farmer kept on going unperturbed. 

A man rushed up and said excitedly, "Don't you know that your jar broke?"

"Yes" the old farmer answered. "I know". I heard it fall. It's broken , the soup is gone -- what can I do about it? he asked.  

Ref: From Management Thoughts by Batra and Batra. Published by Think Inc. 

How to Feel Happy

It is good news that researchers at the London School of Economics have discovered the "happiness gene" which is a form of the gene 5-HTT. Further they state that the gene is inherited  from parents and distributes serotonin(5-HT) in the body.across the nerve cells. It is known the 5-HT is involved in the regulation of mood, sleep, arousal, pain memory and other personal relationships. Research at the cellular level has revealed that chemistry is involved in behaviours like mood, love, and happiness. But above all these genetic factors like environment, society, and socio-economic factors have an important role to play. Moreover, it is said, "You can be as happy as your neighbour wants you to be'".Thus. the discovery of the "happiness gene" is a great revelation, and a marvel of mother nature.

Reference:  RD, March 2022